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2018 Holiday Parody

Adapted from “Twas the Night Before Christmas”

‘Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the office
Not a creature was stirring, not even the bosses.
The stockings were hung on the cube walls with care,
In hopes that our bonuses soon would be there.

The sys admin in tie dye, wearing sandals with socks,
Leaned back at his desk, thinking […]

2017 Christmas Database Parody song

An Ode to Oracle 18c Autonomous Database
Sing to the tune of “Away in a Manger”

Autonomous database, about you I’ve read,
That you can perform complex chores in my stead.
I’m wondering how much work you can defray:
If I’m late for home, can you start a souffle?

Make me some coffee with two extra creams,
Log onto eHarmony; find the […]

2016 holiday parody song

Happy holidays! Hope you enjoy this year’s song as much as I enjoyed writing it.

Sing to the tune of “Auld Lang Syne”

For all the data you forgot
To back up with RMAN,
For all tables you just dropped,
With no DR plan.

For all the exports you now need
And in fact have not got,
For all you try to make […]

McNeely Tech is now an Oracle Reseller

Happy New Year!

Would you like to buy your Oracle products from someone in your network? Would you like attentive, courteous service even for small Oracle orders?

Yes?

We’re ready to help you with that. McNeely Tech is now a commercial sector reseller of Oracle products.

If you have an Oracle order in your future, call us today at […]

2015 Christmas parody song – enjoy!

“A Database Christmas Carol”
(Sing to the tune of “The Twelve Days of Christmas”)
By Mary Elizabeth McNeely, 2009

On the first day of Christmas,
My true love sent to me
An index that’s a b-tree.

On the twelfth day of Christmas,
My true love sent to me
Twelve cache hit ratios,
Eleven time zone patches,
Ten consultants a-sleeping,
Nine sysops dancing,
Eight scripts a-spooling,
Seven users a-squawking,
A […]

Don’t break my heart! (Valentine’s Day, 2014 Edition)

An oldie, but goodie – I haven’t trotted this story out in a few years, and it’s worth considering on a regular basis, so here we go again!

It was a sickening moment.

“We should have listened to you, Mary Elizabeth,” the client said. He didn’t look well.

I had been pestering this client for quite a […]

2013 Database Christmas Song

Happy Holidays, everyone!  Here’s your holiday database song.  It’s about trying to attract DBA talent, which can be challenging.  Sing it to the tune of “Little Drummer Boy”:

Come, we beg them, pa rum pum pum pum
Our new contract to see, pa rum pum pum pum
Their high demands they bring, pa rum pum pum pum
That seem […]

Fried foods, heck yeah! But what about fried databases?

Ah, the State Fair of Texas has come and gone!  We’re famous in the south for our fried foods, and the tradition is alive and well at the Fair.

A few fried foods I’ve either seen or read about at the Fair over the years:

Fried margarita
Fried spinach dip
Fried butter
Fried Nutella
Fried shrimp and grits
Fried bubble gum

In the […]

Sun Server Sales on the Rebound

Hooray!  For the first time since 2007, Sun server sales are up.

I’m pleased to hear of this milestone, especially given how difficult it must have been for Oracle to soothe the worried minds of existing Sun owners after the acquisition.  I’m also curious how much of this increase was due to Exadata server sales.

See http://www.itworld.com/168151/oracle-returns-growth-sun-server-business-idc.

Stump the Oracle Guru

The D/FW Unix Users Group (DFWUUG) unexpectedly and belatedly needed a speaker for its May 5 meeting.  I volunteered to speak, in case they wanted to hear about Oracle architecture, but warned that I didn’t have a presentation put together, so it would be very informal.  Oracle sounds like an odd topic for a Unix […]